Dear Richard Madeley: Should I stop sending presents to my late husband’s great-grandson?

My stepdaughter never initiates contact with me, and I get no word of thanks for my generosity

I’m a widow in my 70s (my husband died seven years ago) and I shall shortly be moving 50 or so miles to be nearer my daughter. I don’t have any of my family where I live now, but my late husband’s daughter (who I shall call A) and her family live about five miles away. I have always had a very good relationship with them, as well as with my stepson and my late husband’s extended family. I have lent A money several times (which has always been repaid). However, over the past few years my relationship with her has changed quite radically.
It all started during lockdown. I spoke to my own family often on Zoom, and my stepson and I had regular phone calls, but I didn’t hear from A unless I telephoned her. Later I would go round for a cup of tea, but she never suggested visiting me.
A has since become a grandmother, but the thing is I have only seen the baby three or four times, despite getting Christmas cards describing me as ‘the world’s best grandmother’ and ‘an awesome great-grandma’. I also send birthday and Christmas presents, but I never receive a word of thanks. 
When I told A I was moving, she said she understood that I wanted to be nearer my family and was surprised I hadn’t moved earlier. She asked when I was going and said she hoped she’d see me before I went; that was about six weeks ago, and I haven’t heard from her since. My question is, do I keep on sending Christmas/birthday presents to my step-great-grandson when I do move, or just not bother since they don’t seem to want to bother with me?
— K, Lancs
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You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. That old saw pretty much sums up your situation vis-à-vis your step-great-grandson – or rather his parents. You want and expect more and better feedback from them after you’ve posted their son gifts; but they obviously think a ‘world’s best grandmother/great-grandma’ card does the job. For you, that’s simply not enough. You feel taken for granted – even snubbed. Similarly, ‘A’ is happy to have you round for elevenses, but doesn’t feel she needs to visit you in return. Is that so bad? 
Can I be honest, K? I think you are perhaps being a little oversensitive about all of this. I accept that, by your lights, your stepfamily are not observing all the niceties that you feel are important, but you need to be careful not to overreact. (I’m not suggesting that you are; after all, you’ve written to me because you’re not sure what to make of their casual behaviour.)
If you do break off contact after you’ve moved away, you may find that’s a one-way street. If it were me, K, I’d keep my lines of communication open. And as far as stopping sending the little boy Christmas and birthday presents… well, obviously that’s up to you. But I suggest you ask yourself this question: what would your late husband have wanted you to do? You may find more wisdom in your memories of him than I can offer here.